According to our AI Super Computer DEEP BLUES BROTHER, this is what is expected team by team...

CURRENT CHAMPION: Hooper's Corner Hookers-Brandy McFadden.

After a stunning performance to win last season it is good of Brandy to give everyone a chance by drafting so poorly. B has opted for a decent core of consistent performers as is his style but it's the squad depth that many will be pleased to see. A mix of injuries and inconsistency mark the backups. Will Jackie G fall back off the wagon? Will Dejan K ever be the same player? Estevao, Fatawu, Frimpong, Savio, Nghumoa all have upside but all could ultimately wash up on the beach. And two very chancy GK picks to boot. 

DBB says Not this time Champ!

Olden NO-Mick McCall

Is there ever a season where Mick isn't in contention? Two excellent GK's make a formidable barrier. Some very solid defenders with goal potential. Quality in midfield and one of the best strikers of last season. If Tzolis and Sangare are as good as advertised this may be the Gold Standard.

DBB says This is how you build a squad!

Paddy Power-Jack Greenwell

Jack was every bit the contender last season and nothing changes here. Two very good and stable GK's to anchor the ship. Haaland and Declan will again score big you have to expect and Gakpo could easily join them. Harry Wilson, Jeremy Pino and Alex Scott are all rising stars and have the potential to burst in bright colours this season. Rodri, Rashford and Garnacho may prove to be white elephants but Jack may well kick on to better things here.

DBB says A young Buck with the real potential for a growth spurt!

Scorpion King-Fred Chiovaro

Fred has over the years taken on the role of awkward customer and the role suits him well. What he lacks in consistency he more than makes up for with an unexpected lights out punch. His GK's can be great and not so great and that might prove a weakness. The strength lies in the potential of Wirtz, M'buemo and perhaps even Brobbey to score some big points and in backup Schade, Simms, Ayari and King all have breakout potential. Porro, Kerkez and Mingueza should all score well from the back.

DBB says Awkward but with an upside!

Hatem's Wildcards-Liam Shepley

Unlucky Liam, so close to getting it right yet finishing so far away from glory. Can he improve and win that first title...maybe not. A decent keeper in Kelleher for sure but is one enough? Three Arse boys should be front and centre for consistent points, Truffert and Semenyo likewise but are there a few too many under performing barcodes in the squad? Mateo Fernandes will need to be worth all that money and avoid his third consecutive relegation for Liam to have any chance.

DBB says Jaissle will need to work a miracle for Liam to improve!

Same Old Shearer-Jon Greenwell

And whilst we are on the subject of under-achieving Barcodes...Here's Jonny! Just the three current and two ex-Magpies in this current effort but watch this space, he may yet try to pick up Sam Fender on waivers. Jon's midfield it has oft been said is as good as anyone's on paper. This season there may be doubts though. Bruno F thinking over a move to the desert, Bruno G pining for the Fjords and N'diaye maybe also slightly unsettled if we believe the press. Given the price tag you would expect Elliot Anderson to thrive at least...unless Enzo finds a way to break him. At least Raya should be worth a few clean sheets.

DBB says Buckle down it's bound to be a bumpy ride!

We're No Angels- Sandy Canetti

Sandy started the mind games early by insisting that the older geezers in the UK stayed up past their bedtimes for the auction. And they call Fergie the master? Anyway, any advantage was quickly squandered by over-egging the Tottenham pudding again. Yes he has some help from Manchester scattered around but will that be enough? The Liverpool number one will help too you would think but this is a bold move even for Sandy.

DBB says Is De Zerbi really that good?

Bayo's Back in Town-Nic Tinson

Nic has strangely gambled big on Chelski this time around. But where will Enzo, Pedro and Action Jackson wind up playing their football? If two or all three go abroad it will be a massive backfire was the usually wise old head. Steady GK's two decent Brighton wingers (when fully fit) and a whole host of talent in Eze, Hackney, Sarr and the other Pedro show that old Nic hasn't gone totally ga ga yet.

DBB says Uncertainty reigns supreme but don't take your eyes off him for a minute!

Tueart's Overheads- Davey Hoffman

Now Pep has left it seems Dave can now switch his allegiance to The Arse. No less than four Goonies in the squad is a big step for our ex-Blue. Who knows what eleven Arse will put out week to week though, quite a few of those picked could see plenty of splinter duty. Szoboslai will surely star again but where is the back up? An ageing Jon McGinn? Mateta? Surely not Jacob Murphy and Elanga? Dave has already predicted another last place finish. Dare anyone second guess that?

DBB says Mad Dogs and Englishmen should stay out of the Texas sun!

Os Lobos Do Diablo-Wayne Shepley

A raft of expensive holdovers and then a mad  early £40 m punt on Isak in the auction. They do say it's a thin line between madness and genius...wafer thin. The holdovers should keep the ship steady, Isak might come golden again but depth looks iffy. Two pretty average keepers perhaps. It was a risk and risks rarely pay off outside of the movies.

DBB says Don't go splashing out on the silver polish just yet, maybe use that cabinet as a bookcase!

 

Final Standings May 2027

 

1  Olden NO

2 Paddy Power

3. Bayo's Back in Town

4. Hooper's Corner Hookers

5. Scorpion King

6. Os Lobos Do Diablo

7. Hatem's Wildcards

8. Same Old Shearer

9. We're No Angels

10. Tueart's Overheads

Deep Blues Brother has spoken!